Forget “Skinny”

Smily faceAnd forget fat and forget diet and forget guilt. Flush it all down the toilet and let’s collectively breath a huge sigh of relief. Now that we don’t have to deal with any of thatanymore, we can start living a little and maybe even start a little happiness project, like for example, working on being happy, eeks, in our own skin! (Heaven forbid!!) We’re women, we’re our own worst critics and we’re not happy in our own skin. We like other people’s skin, like Gisele Bundchen’s or Jennifer Aniston’s; not our own, no way!

What the hell?

Why are we so hard on ourselves? Where did Happy go? Where did Satisfaction go? Confidence? Self-esteem? Anyone? Why are we always depriving, dieting, avoiding and guilting our way to a ‘better life’, which we take to mean a ‘skinny’ life? Why become that magical number on the scale when it took months of misery to get there? Sure you’re 120 pounds, your “goal” weight, but look what it took to get there? Latte breakfasts, salad lunches and diet coke dinners; daily runs despite your barking hip, 50 minute sessions with a videoed barbie doll that you want to punch the living daylights out of, and zumba classes that you still can’t get the hang of.

It’s not the destination but the journey you take to get there that counts, we’ve all heard that. So why not enjoy the ride? Enjoy the eating, enjoy the exercising and the results are sure to follow. Since starting my own business, I’ve been told on more than one occasion that when you do what you love, you’ll never have to work a day in your life! So clearly, when it’s not something you enjoy, it’s a struggle. It’s not fun and you don’t look forward to it. (Lord knows that’s true!)

So I now have to ask: Wouldn’t exercising be so much more enjoyable if you found an activity you actually liked and that made you feel great on the inside and outside? Why not work on something specific that interests you, like becoming a better squash player or tennis player. Work on sprinting farther or walking longer. Take what you like and get better at it. That’s when fitness becomes a part of your life and lifestyle. It ceases to be a burden and becomes a release… and you’ll never workout again a day in your life. (Did that translate well?!)

And what about eating? Why does it have to suck? It totally shouldn’t! Eat popcorn with butter if you want. Have a chocolatey snack if you so desire. Devour some late afternoon jujubes. Don’t deprive yourself. Enjoy. Just learn to enjoy in moderation. If you don’t allow yourself the occasional treat, then you’re going to be one miserable lump. You’re going to be unhappy, annoyed and unsatisfied. That is, right up until you cave. Then you’re going to be guilt-ridden. It’s a vicious cycle and one we continue to get caught up in. Indulge here and there and then get on with life.

Forget skinny…  be happy.

Anne Marie Costanzo is a nationally certified personal trainer and owner of Little Black Dress Personal Training. She can be reached at or (914) 841-1121.

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About the Author: Anne Marie Constanzo